SharksSharksSharks

It is Sharkweek, the greatest week known to man. (Aside from Christmas, the week of my birthday, and the random camping week I try to take every year).

Sharks are a phenomenal animal (fish?). Glorious, and ...misunderstood? It's true.

Name some horrific, freaky way to die. Car accident. Plane crash. Lightning. You have more chances of dying those ways than of dying of a shark attack. Sharks are like that kid in class who grew quicker than everyone else at a very young age, and as a result are a big huge lug of a child.

So normally, this big burly kid gets snubbed and labelled 'bully' or 'brute'; but really, his heart is made of gold and he just wants to play with you guys. It's not his fault he doesn't realize his own strength, and almost breaks your arm when giving you a high five. He simply doesn't understand that since he's got a body that is like a tank, his high fives are more aggressive than the ones he sees everyone else participating in.

To sum up, sharks are like the awkward big kid who grew too early and doesn't know his own strength. Appreciate them for their sheer strength, we all know you're envious. Don't kill them because they pose an unrealistic threat of sudden death; they just don't know the power of their own high fives, that's all.

Now get off your computer and go enjoy the magnificent Sharkweek.

http://calvinandhobbesagain.wordpress.com/2009/06/13/shark-attack/

(I wish I was a shark)

Choose Your Own Adventure

I love StumbleUpon.

You select your interests, you hit 'Stumble.' You are directed to a site you never would have come across any other way, based on your selected interests.

I have found so many interesting, cool, entertaining and informative sites before. From an amusing photo, to 37 best uses for Vick's Vapo-Rub, to news articles and lists of books to read before you die, StumbleUpon makes me feel like the Internet was created for me.

It's almost like a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book, web-style. You are given the tools to create a crazy adventure, but you are ultimately in control. Do you hit stumble and continue on your adventure? Or do you click an interesting link at the bottom of the random design site StumbleUpon so graciously showed to you? Do you add this to your bookmarks (Careful - use with caution - stumbling can take up hours of otherwise productive time, and you will come across many a good site). Or do you simply favourite the page to help SU (we're on close terms, it's ok to use nicknames) know your sense of humour and curiosity better?

And one more reason I love StumbleUpon? The fact that it's called StumbleUpon. It's like it knows me, knows the way I go about - rather, stumble - through life. And Showing me some crazy sites along the way.

I think for now I will.....stumble on to page 37 and see what's laying behind that door....

http://su.pr/6MjOdD

The Separation of Hairy Knuckles

Magical.

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe

I'll Take A Chuckle Over A Pin To The Eye Any Day.

I am so limited in my television show consumption. But for a reason.

Most shows allow you yes, to zone out; yes, to forget about your troubles; yes, to connect to characters; yes to maybe even learn something new. And yes, most shows allow you to feel something. What, you ask? Most shows allow you to feel the emotional equivalent of a pin jab to the eye.

Now why would anyone want to subject themselves to that?

I've seen enough drama in life (nothing crazy, just the usual drama that come with living life) to have no desire to watch your typical drama shows - Desperate Housewives, Gilmore Girls, etc. If I want to feel the stress that comes with fighting with your friends, going through rough patches in relationships, or any other unpleasant situation, I'll wait until I am forced to experience it live instead.

I can't sing, and have no desire to watch others as bad as (or worse) than I on any American Idol-esque show; I get embarrassed when I look like an idiot, and if you can't see that you do, I feel embarrassed for you.

I've spent hundreds of joyless, heartbreaking hours in hospitals in 2010 to take all the joy out of watching your typical hospital shows - Grey's Anatomy, ER, etc. I would be happy never to see the inside of one again, on TV or in real life.

If I wanted to see people making fools of themselves over love, I'll go watch the love triangles at any random bar on a Saturday night than sit and watch shows like The Bachelor/ette.

So what does that leave me? Hilarity. Things that make me laugh. When you think about it, why would you go out of your way to make yourself feel sad? Humiliated (for someone else)? Scared? I want to laugh. Always. Don't get me wrong, feeling a range of emotions is a natural and important aspect of life. But when I feel these things, I want them to be for real reasons. Not for some fictional character on TV.

I mean, if I went up to you, handed you a pin, and said, "Hey! I have this pin! For some entertainment, and because we're bored, or just want to sit and view something that will capture our interest, why don't you jab this pin in your eye?" It would allow you to experience something that people usually try to avoid if possible....so why would you (I hope) not jab the pin in your eye, yet watch a gruesome episode of Law & Order about the sexual exploitation of a little kid that makes you feel equally as nauseous?

So, my friends, it is almost 10:30 at night. I just got home from work. I am looking to relax, zone out, and immerse myself in something that captures my interest and makes me feel happy. Shows like Arrested Development, How I Met Your Mother, Flight Of The Conchords, and best of all, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

Dee, Mac, Charlie, Dennis and Frank....thank you for being here right now, and not being the equivalent of a jab with a pin to the eye.

Speed Dating: Blog-Style

I have decided that I need to amplify my online presence.

As an official 'communicator' (I have the degree and diploma to prove it), I realize that weblife is an important factor. Before graduation, I simply did not have the time to commit to the upkeep of my normal life, let alone my online life. But now that I am a graduate, I have all this weird 'free time' on my hands. It's a strange, new wonderful feeling. So, I decided to devote my time to something more productive than watching episode after episode of It's Always Sunny and HIMYM online.

That, and I finally got my own brand spankin new Macbook and I feel compelled to be on it ALL.THE.TIME.

So, I shall try this 'blog' thing you net-savvy communicators speak of. My query, however, is what to blog about? Even when I was assigned to maintain a blog about advertising, I couldn't. Not that I don't love advertising, it's just that I love it on another level...not the blogging level. Make sense? I didn't think so. But I get it, so don't worry.

So, still, what to blog about?

I love many a subject. But do I love any subject enough to write new, interesting and funny things about it on an almost daily basis? That's a lot of commitment....I don't do so well with the 'C' word nowadays. So, this could be a troubling factor.

Maybe I just need to create a blog about a different subject every day. Will it have avid followers? Probably not. Will it have a primary audience? The entire idea screams 'not a chance.' Will it keep ME entertained? Probably.

Maybe my solution is something along the lines of speed dating. I will try a new blog subject (the 'date') every entry (the 'speed') until I find The One. You know, the one that I find myself thinking about all the time, that just pops into my head, the one I can't wait to be with....you know, the blog subject that will fulfill my every need the way Prince Charming satisfies the normal speed daters'. So, I begin my blog speed dating quest.

This analogy brought to you by the minds at Lisa Rowson Inc.

(Or maybe start a blog about analogies - my favourite! And, that way, I can talk about anything as long as it's an analogy) I just had an epiphany. You are watching an idea in the making.

This blog post was going to be about finding a new blog subject, using speed dating as an analogy.

Then, I realized I should write about analogies.

THEN, I realized my blog post about finding a blog post answered my question about what to post on my blog. The answer is the question; the question is the answer.

How postmodern.