I'll Take A Chuckle Over A Pin To The Eye Any Day.

I am so limited in my television show consumption. But for a reason.

Most shows allow you yes, to zone out; yes, to forget about your troubles; yes, to connect to characters; yes to maybe even learn something new. And yes, most shows allow you to feel something. What, you ask? Most shows allow you to feel the emotional equivalent of a pin jab to the eye.

Now why would anyone want to subject themselves to that?

I've seen enough drama in life (nothing crazy, just the usual drama that come with living life) to have no desire to watch your typical drama shows - Desperate Housewives, Gilmore Girls, etc. If I want to feel the stress that comes with fighting with your friends, going through rough patches in relationships, or any other unpleasant situation, I'll wait until I am forced to experience it live instead.

I can't sing, and have no desire to watch others as bad as (or worse) than I on any American Idol-esque show; I get embarrassed when I look like an idiot, and if you can't see that you do, I feel embarrassed for you.

I've spent hundreds of joyless, heartbreaking hours in hospitals in 2010 to take all the joy out of watching your typical hospital shows - Grey's Anatomy, ER, etc. I would be happy never to see the inside of one again, on TV or in real life.

If I wanted to see people making fools of themselves over love, I'll go watch the love triangles at any random bar on a Saturday night than sit and watch shows like The Bachelor/ette.

So what does that leave me? Hilarity. Things that make me laugh. When you think about it, why would you go out of your way to make yourself feel sad? Humiliated (for someone else)? Scared? I want to laugh. Always. Don't get me wrong, feeling a range of emotions is a natural and important aspect of life. But when I feel these things, I want them to be for real reasons. Not for some fictional character on TV.

I mean, if I went up to you, handed you a pin, and said, "Hey! I have this pin! For some entertainment, and because we're bored, or just want to sit and view something that will capture our interest, why don't you jab this pin in your eye?" It would allow you to experience something that people usually try to avoid if possible....so why would you (I hope) not jab the pin in your eye, yet watch a gruesome episode of Law & Order about the sexual exploitation of a little kid that makes you feel equally as nauseous?

So, my friends, it is almost 10:30 at night. I just got home from work. I am looking to relax, zone out, and immerse myself in something that captures my interest and makes me feel happy. Shows like Arrested Development, How I Met Your Mother, Flight Of The Conchords, and best of all, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

Dee, Mac, Charlie, Dennis and Frank....thank you for being here right now, and not being the equivalent of a jab with a pin to the eye.

Speed Dating: Blog-Style

I have decided that I need to amplify my online presence.

As an official 'communicator' (I have the degree and diploma to prove it), I realize that weblife is an important factor. Before graduation, I simply did not have the time to commit to the upkeep of my normal life, let alone my online life. But now that I am a graduate, I have all this weird 'free time' on my hands. It's a strange, new wonderful feeling. So, I decided to devote my time to something more productive than watching episode after episode of It's Always Sunny and HIMYM online.

That, and I finally got my own brand spankin new Macbook and I feel compelled to be on it ALL.THE.TIME.

So, I shall try this 'blog' thing you net-savvy communicators speak of. My query, however, is what to blog about? Even when I was assigned to maintain a blog about advertising, I couldn't. Not that I don't love advertising, it's just that I love it on another level...not the blogging level. Make sense? I didn't think so. But I get it, so don't worry.

So, still, what to blog about?

I love many a subject. But do I love any subject enough to write new, interesting and funny things about it on an almost daily basis? That's a lot of commitment....I don't do so well with the 'C' word nowadays. So, this could be a troubling factor.

Maybe I just need to create a blog about a different subject every day. Will it have avid followers? Probably not. Will it have a primary audience? The entire idea screams 'not a chance.' Will it keep ME entertained? Probably.

Maybe my solution is something along the lines of speed dating. I will try a new blog subject (the 'date') every entry (the 'speed') until I find The One. You know, the one that I find myself thinking about all the time, that just pops into my head, the one I can't wait to be with....you know, the blog subject that will fulfill my every need the way Prince Charming satisfies the normal speed daters'. So, I begin my blog speed dating quest.

This analogy brought to you by the minds at Lisa Rowson Inc.

(Or maybe start a blog about analogies - my favourite! And, that way, I can talk about anything as long as it's an analogy) I just had an epiphany. You are watching an idea in the making.

This blog post was going to be about finding a new blog subject, using speed dating as an analogy.

Then, I realized I should write about analogies.

THEN, I realized my blog post about finding a blog post answered my question about what to post on my blog. The answer is the question; the question is the answer.

How postmodern.